Low Maintenance, High Awareness: How Self-Care Helped My Recovery
Since stepping into my 30s, I’ve embraced being low maintenance—maybe a little too low maintenance, according to my mom. But looking back, I realize it wasn’t just about simplicity; it was about survival.
For years, I struggled with addiction, relapsing on and off. But if there’s one thing I’m proud of in my journey, it’s my self-awareness. I never hid the truth from myself or others. At 15 or 16, I knew I had a problem. By 17, I fully accepted it. That level of honesty is freeing—it’s something I thrive on.
In my search for peace, I dove into meditation, minimalism, and mindfulness. Picture little Buddha statues, candles, and the ever-present burning incense. Cliché? Maybe. But it worked. Spending time reconnecting with myself, appreciating nature, and focusing on my own energy helped me realize something powerful: I was never meant to stay an addict. The constant ups and downs? Proof that I was always fighting my way out.
And now? I’m mostly up. But let’s be real—nobody’s perfect. Lapses happen. The key is to pull your big girl (or guy) panties up and keep going.
When Low Maintenance Becomes Too Low Effort
Now, let’s talk self-care. Looking at polished, put-together women, I used to laugh. That’s definitely not the girl who traveled in a van across the country, barely showering. If that’s what it takes, I should quit while I’m ahead.
My mother always told me I was too low maintenance. And when I say that, I mean men’s deodorant, doing my own hair, settling for the bare minimum in relationships. She wasn’t wrong. My partner, comfortable in my minimalist ways, stopped making an effort. No romance. No compliments. No date nights. And let’s be honest—drugs can kill those things, too.
But now that we’ve been clean for a few months, I’ve taken her words to heart. I decided to take better care of myself—not for anyone else, but for me.
I started small: self-tanner, a good razor (not the cheap men’s one), moisturizer, styling my hair, a little makeup, even false lashes. And guess what? My partner noticed. Compliments are flowing. Attraction is alive again.
But here’s the thing—I do this for me. Feeling put together makes me feel good. And you know what? It’s helping in my recovery, too.
Because self-care and healing can coexist. You can meditate with false eyelashes on. You can be spiritual and still spruce yourself up. You can be a warrior in recovery and still want to look in the mirror and love what you see.
So, if you’re in a season of rebuilding, try showing up for yourself in small ways. You don’t have to go full glam—just do what makes you feel good. Because you deserve that.
And remember, even if you stumble, you are never defeated.
- The ADHD Guru,
Angelina Karmella
